The other day my friend Britney & I were talking and I said that I needed a little more help around the house -- so I guess I'd better have another baby. Of course I was kidding and of course it takes forever for them to grow up enough to "help" and of course it takes forever to teach them how to "help". Plus let's face it I don't think I can handle more than 5.So that is where I am now trying to teach my little pups some responsibility so they can be good productive adults and (bonus) help vacuum. At book club the other night I was talking to Robyn about how to design an efficient chore/ job chart. She had some great ideas she got from this book which I guess I need to go buy today.
The problem is the more I think about it the more I just can't decide what to do. What "system will work best? I know a "wheel" kind of chart wont work because the chores that Alli can do are not the chores Barry can do.
So I am asking for a little help. What has worked for you? Have you used tickets, beans, money, a nice pat on the back for a reward? How often to you give a reward? How do you track progress? How have your kids responded? I don't want to have a system that will take too much time to manage but I really feel like I need some kind of system. OK I'll stop rambling now...let me know what you think.
8 comments:
I was just thinking about the exact same thing....i am going to be very intrested to see what posts you will get, becouse, I am also looking for a solution.
My mom sent me her comment in an e-mail but I wanted to share it...
I know what a struggle this is. One things is not all chores should be based on a reward; part of living in the household is taking part.
I remembered reading an article in the LDS Living Magazine, so found it . Check out the link. It is all general items but can give you an internal pep talk. http://www.ldslivingmagazine.com/articles/show/1873
http://www.theideadoor.com/JobCharts.html#CHORE%20CHART%20WITH%20RIBBON
these are both good places to look, good luck
Mom
I agree so much with your mom's point, helping around the house is part of living there. Rewards and validation for hard work are nice in moderation.
That being said, I haven't mastered the art of motivating my children to do housework without direct compensation. I've tried a bit of this with Sy and Finn and I think they get used to just being expected to help. Bruno isn't as easy to experiment on in this area but I'm hanging on.
Thanks for the websites, I'll check them out.
We have a chart with magnets--all the kids have basically the same jobs during the school year--pretty basic--they get points and the points add up to a goal--they also have a bean jar--in this they get beans for good behavior, good choices, doing their chores--when the bean jar is full we get to do a fun family activity. Right now they are working towards a trip to Fat Cats--
this can be so confusing cause there is so many ideas out there and so many different theories. And then there is the whole keeping it consistant thing--somedays are really hard for me to keep up with all of it.
but we keep on trying. I guess that is what matter.
Good luck--I'm going to go read those articles your mom suggested.
First of all, I LOVE the picture!
I am struggling with the same problem. It can be tricky to find developmentally appropriate jobs for ea. child. I thought sweeping would be fine for Robyn (she was sick of unloading the dishwasher and setting the table), but she really can't do it yet. I want her to do jobs that don't need to be done while she's gone at school...
Myles and I have also discussed a reward system, esp. allowances a lot. I don't want my kids to do jobs just to get paid or to choose not to do jobs just because they don't want to get paid.
One of his sisters has her kids do certain jobs and then they can earn money if they choose to do any extra jobs. That seems like a pretty good idea. My kids don't really need an allowance yet, but it would help them learn to save, etc. As they get older, I don't want them asking for money whenever they need/want it.
I get tired of picking up after everyone, so I might try what my mom did when we were kids. She'd put it away in a box and then we'd have to do an extra job to get it back out.
I've heard of families putting all the jobs that need to be done on slips of paper in a jar on a Sat. morning, and having everyone pick one. When everyone's done, they get to do something fun together.
Thanks for conducting this survey- I can't wait to hear all the results. I need to find a good system and stay consistent. I have it ready to go but I need a good chart or board to facilitate it.
Ohhh, Christie, my mom did the same thing! It was called "jail" and if you left your stuff around you had to do a job to get it out of jail. It was so annoying but VERY effective!
I agree that there should be some things they are just expected to do to help the family, but I like in that book where it says they should also have the opportunity to make money for jobs b/c that is how it works in the real world. Ultimately, that is what we're preparing them for, right? So I plan to do both.
Hey you could check out this web site houseoforder.com it has some good ideas on it also. Love your blog.
Cool ideas! My kids will probably be sorry I read this post. Like many of you we also struggle with this. Right now the problem is the parents. We haven't been consistent in filling out the chart every day. Not much motivation for the little ones when that happens.
For what it's worth we've found when we do use the chore chart it works pretty well. We separate "chores" from "tasks." I didn't want scripture reading and prayer to be lumped in with "chores" if you know what I mean. The oldest is starting to understand the difference, but I do sometimes wonder if I should take those things off the chart.
Anyway, if a day's chores/tasks are accomplished without oodles of nagging (that's one of the biggest reasons for the chart, right? Let them to take responsibility for doing things without so much prompting--just point them to the chart) the child earns a nickle. The amount doesn't really matter because it's only spent in our Family Store (got this idea from a colleague). I keep it stocked with little toys/food that can be "bought" for the prices I set. It's a pretty exciting time when we open the store and it gives us an opportunity to teach about the value of money and introduce the concepts of tithing and saving, etc.
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